The Anatomy of a Suicide

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree
Where they strung up a man they say murdered three
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree
Where the dead man called out for his love to flee
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree

Are you ,are you
Coming to the tree
Where I told you to run so we’d both be free
Strange things did happen here
No stranger it would be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree
Wear a necklace of rope side by side with me
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met up at midnight in the hanging tree

Suzanne Collins, Mokingjay

I read Jay Asher’s Thirteen Reasons Why.  It was a story of a girl who recorded cassette tapes enumerating the thirteen reasons why she committed suicide. Her name was Hannah Baker. Baker’s dozen and the “snowball effect”.

Hannah described how that each seemingly insignificant act by the people around her accumulated, making her feel that life was spinning wildly out of control and how that taking her life was the only remaining thing she has power over. And I thought while reading that her reasons were sort of shallow. But who am I to judge? I guess people are wired differently.

Hannah was desperate. She thought of her damaged reputation, lost hope and missed chances at redemption. She thought life sucked and gave up on the whole institution. She took the easy way out, which I never would have done.

I know that life is full of drudgery. You have to suffer and bleed but life will still not offer you concessions. The only good thing about it is that you get used to the pain, you become stronger. But that doesn’t also mean that just because you’ve suffered more, life owes you something. It never did and never will.  So there is no reason being condescending, thinking that you deserve more out of life because of what you’ve endured and put up with.  That’s just the way of the world. So smile and charge into the future expecting the worst but hoping for the best because life’s a beach. 😀

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